As an experienced mother of another little boy, one would think that a second son’s bris would be easier. Nope! It was so much worse. I was a mess the night before, just like last time. Once again I had thoughts of running away with the baby and saving him from this trauma. I didn’t but was close at times. In fact I actually told JL I was going to stay home and not go. With NHL I knew what was going to happen, but I wasn’t ready for it afterward (the diaper changes and post circumcision wound). In addition to that I almost passed out before hand since I had not eaten much and was on antibiotic thanks to double mastitis. This time everyone made sure to make me eat prior to the mohel showing up.
Well, we all went and a bunch of people couldn’t make it at the last minute. No big deal, I was actually very happy with the people that were sick being nice enough to stay home and not expose the baby and rest of us to something. Then there were issues within the family that made matters even more tense for me(not going into it here, but let’s just say things are not happy go lucky with some members).
When Rabbi S came my heart started to pound. I wanted my baby back and almost lost it with tears. I kept it together at that point and eventually managed to get JSL back to put him in his gown. The worst part was being the one to hand over my perfect little monkey to him and opening his diaper so he could assess things. I just wanted to run away and cry. I walked back to where NHL was and stood there and heard JSL start to scream. I knew the worst was over by the time they take him out for the part in front of everyone, but by that point I had to sit down and had tissues in my hands. Before we went home my mother helped me with the first post bris diaper change. I almost passed out (and I am not a typically squeamish person). The wrap on the wound that wasn’t supposed to come off for 24 hours came off. I nearly lost it. My mother sensed it and later came over to help me with the next change and wrap since once again the darn thing came off with the diaper.
The make a long story short, poor JSL didn’t open his eyes after the bris on Monday until late yesterday afternoon. The first night was hell. He screamed his head off and didn’t know how to soothe himself. No matter what we did he wasn’t happy. Eventually, he would eat with his eyes clamped shut (and not a lot at that) and slept abnormal amounts – even for a week old baby. I called the doctor and they said he had been through a traumatic experience (reminding me that he wouldn’t remember this later) and this was his way of dealing. By the time they called he was starting to come out of it and was eating some. Last night he was actually awake and alert for 3 hours straight (5-8). It was so nice having my little guy back and not having him scream when it was time to change a diaper.
Thank goodness we just found out my brother and his wife are expecting a little girl in September. I don’t think I could handle another bris so close.
Here are some photos from Monday.
Sleeping after the wine and bottle of mommy milk: